Why Can’t I Be You?

I just realized that I haven’t updated this blog in 2 weeks. EEK!  I really need to get on a stricter schedule…

Last week I lost another .4, bringing my total loss to 20.8 lbs.

Even though ANY loss is a victory, I felt like I was hitting a wall with WW. Things were becoming routine.  Not boring.  Just…Blah.  Nothing really new was happening.  I was eating the same foods and knew Points values by heart for most of my meals.  It got to the point where I wasn’t writing foods down at all!  I was doing Points in my head (which is pretty normal for some people I discovered) and tallying it all up at the end of the day because I was so lazy/confident that I was doing OK.

And I was right.  I WAS doing OK and the program was STILL working but I wasn’t seeing the results I wanted anymore.

Along with that, I’ve been feeling lazy about WW lately.  I’m at the point where I look good in pics, get complimented on my appearance, and feel much more secure in my skin that I’m like, “Why bother with this shit? I’m good now!”

I brought it up at the meeting and got a firm kick in the ass from a woman who I see there all the time.  She’s like a one woman version of Statler and Waldorf from The Muppet Show.  When she speaks up at meetings, she can be a bit harsh and even a little rude, so I was scared when she volunteered to give me some advice.  She went on to joke about how “smug” I was at the last meeting when talking about lost 20 lbs and looking at photos from a few months ago to now and being amazed at the difference.  She suggested I use the photos to keep pushing me.  When I told her that the pics weren’t doing it for me anymore, she offered me even better advice.

She said that years ago at her old WW meeting place, her meeting leader brought in a funhouse mirror that makes you look thin.  Not a mirror that grossly distorts how you look (big head/out of proportion) but a mirror that actually shows you what you look like skinny.

“The problem is that we have NO clue what we look like skinny!” she said, which is why it makes it so hard to keep pushing.  But one look in that mirror and she was back on track.

Not really sure why her words of advice helped me so much this week (NOTE:  I did not buy a funhouse mirror) but it was that firm kick in the ass I needed.

Her jokingly talking about how I sounded at the last meeting made me see that there are people out there that wish they were me when it comes to weight loss (and beyond, too).  It’s insane to think that some would kill for my current figure, good habits, weekly losses, whatever!

Why was somebody basically saying,”I WISH I could lose like you!” so motivating this week?  Maybe because I never felt like anyone would want to be me.  I always felt like the person you did NOT want to be like.  Kinda like Goofus and Gallant of the Highlights magazines.  No sane person wants to be a Goofus (that dude’s a prick)…Everybody wants to be nice like Gallant (even though he’s a bit of a kiss ass).   But I was wrong.  Crazy as it is for me to think, realize (and type) but there ARE traits I have that others desire.  And that is pretty damn cool.

I used this little revelation to my advantage this week and really pushed myself to have a good week.  And I did!  I didn’t weigh in yet but I did things I never thought I’d ever be capable of.  Like resisting a slice of freshly baked apple pie that my boss brought in even though I had the Points/craving for it.  And going to the gym to do a real work out on a Sunday when I could’ve been lounging.

It took me 26 years to discover that we are all a little insecure, sometimes unsure, and always want what we can’t or don’t have.  I’m not the only one.  Care to share your feelings about this?  Would love to hear you out!

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